Heaven-In a deep, earth-shattering voice yesterday, God announced his resignation from position as Supreme Being, for the entire world to hear.
In a recent statement via prayer waves, God confessed that the world had become as boring as a reality TV show and agreed that popular culture was doing a better job of effectively controlling the minds of the population than belief of Him ever did.
“Sometimes my creations turn out to be mistakes,” He stated, simply.
Most evangelists embraced the news as a symbol of modern times, while church administrators and government officials took another, more realistic position.
“Well, if this God guy thinks he can just waltz down to earth with no money and no job, he’s got another thing coming,” Warren Dak of the IRS said. “I don’t think we can give him any social security benefits due to his lack of presence on any official record.”
To date, God has given no hint to His future endeavors, while hopefuls, including ice cream truck driver Steve Adams and hair stylist Sylvie Stern, line up to fill His post.
In a recent statement via prayer waves, God confessed that the world had become as boring as a reality TV show and agreed that popular culture was doing a better job of effectively controlling the minds of the population than belief of Him ever did.
“Sometimes my creations turn out to be mistakes,” He stated, simply.
Most evangelists embraced the news as a symbol of modern times, while church administrators and government officials took another, more realistic position.
“Well, if this God guy thinks he can just waltz down to earth with no money and no job, he’s got another thing coming,” Warren Dak of the IRS said. “I don’t think we can give him any social security benefits due to his lack of presence on any official record.”
To date, God has given no hint to His future endeavors, while hopefuls, including ice cream truck driver Steve Adams and hair stylist Sylvie Stern, line up to fill His post.
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